Lists and List of Things

I've always made lists, specifically of stuff I wanted. As a child, I actually learned to read by going through catalogs rather than books. My first lists were about toys, usually compiled in anticipation of a birthday or Christmas. Later this habit/compulsion would lead to lists of photographic equipment, audio electronics, books, music, movies, recording studio equipment, and anything else I was fantasizing about at the moment. Most of my lists never led to purchases, they were aimed at an ideal, not meant to be realistic, a form of escapism. For some reason, the path to my dreams was always guided by what I would need to get there. To be a photojournalist, I need this camera, these lenses, etc. To start backpacking the Rockies, I'd need this pack, this tent, and this sleeping bag.

A few years ago, after discovering eBay, I did indulge myself and essentially purchased everything I had on a list of my from back in college. It was what I considered a reasonable stereo then, completely beyond my means, but reasonable nonetheless: a Rega Planar 3 turntable, a Conrad-Johnson PV-10 preamplifier, a B&K amplifier, and Snell Type A speakers. Now that it was all 20 years older and available on eBay, I couldn't resist. I assumed it might cure me of my list-mania but it actually confirmed something for me, my list was dead on back then- it was a killer stereo. I even added some items from more recent lists, a Rega Planet 2000 CD player and some Kimber Kable and Audioquest cables, and found myself sitting in disbelief at the sound it was making, it was even better than the stuff I had lusted for in audiophile stores over the last 2 decades. Audio nirvana.

So this left me befuddled, as I'm now to believe that if I could actually afford all these things I put on all my lists, it in fact would make me happier. In fact, I also bought a camera I had wanted back in the 80's, a Nikon F4s and some manual focus lenses I had pined for then, and was met with the same result: joy and satisfaction.

I need money, fast....